The Matrimania Cure: How Single Black Women are living happy, successful lives without being lonely

[M.C. (Nika) Beamon]

As June, the most country's most popular wedding month, fast approaches, women will be bombarded with countless images and media suggestions that that they tie the knot. The reality is that statistics show most American women will spend more years of their adult lives unmarried rather than married. For African American women, the prospect of marriage is dismal; a staggering 70 percent of them live without a man.

Despite the bleak data about the state of marriage, the entire nation is still wedding crazy. Every movie and television show ends with a walk down the aisle; it's the proverbial happy ending. According to The Wedding Report, a Tucson, Ariz.-based research firm, couples are willing to pay a fortunate to get their "happily ever after." Even with the recent economic troubles, on average they'll spend about 6 thousand less for weddings this year than last. But, that's not saying much since the average cost of a wedding in 2008 was $21,814.

So, the question must be asked: is it possible to be happily single with "matrimania" seemingly everywhere? A book: I Didn’t Work This Hard Just to Get Married by Nika C. Beamon says yes you can but to do it you have to buck convention.

In I Didn’t Work This Hard Just to Get Married, through lively and revealing interviews with women from various walks of life, Nika Beamon explores the challenges and issues affecting single black women who defy expectations. Among the women who share their stories in the book: Actress Kim Coles, Movie Producer Effie T. Brown ('Real Women Have Curves') and Interior Designer Sheila Bridges.

Now you may think the women in this book bash men or have no use for them however, it's quite the contrary. Almost everyone seems to want to share their life with someone. The catch is that until or unless they find that person, they have resolved to live their lives to the fullest. For them, having a happy life is achieved about surrounding themselves with love, sharing their talents and gifts with others, and relying on "girl power" to get through the tough times; something Cheetah Girls creator Deborah Gregory knows a lot about. A former foster child, Gregory has inspired generations of girls to follow their passion and in this project she shows grown women how to do the same.

All of the women in I Didn't Work This Hard Just to Get Married candidly discuss aging without a man and reevaluate dating, single homeownership, career, and children. The book speaks directly to the black woman's experience, addressing unique challenges such as income discrepancies between genders, the high rate of male incarceration, and the Baby Momma Syndrome. The women discuss the false expectations they face from men, from families, and from friends.

Written in the best tradition of girlfriend talking to girlfriend, the book delivers tales of lessons learned, hard times and good times, told by women who found ways to achieve their dreams by defying convention. Their conclusion: singlehood, whether temporary or permanent, and though often challenging, is a fulfilling state.



To read an excerpt:

http://www.redroom.com/member/denali17

To watch video trailer for the book:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x8DcbQsQawk

To find out about signings or readings in your area:

http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/group.php?gid=70022821825

To contact the author: Denali17 @optonline.net, [e-mail]



Advance Praise:



I Didn’t Work This Hard was really positively reviewed in the April 1 issue of Booklist (circ. 24,150). The complete review follows:

I Didn't Work This Hard Just to Get Married (Chicago Review Press, ISBN: 9781556528194)

“Despite the continued cultural emphasis on marriage, 70 percent of black women will live their lives as singles--widowed and divorced, but mostly never married. Whether this statistic is viewed as good, bad, or indifferent depends on a woman's individual perspective. Beamon, a television news writer-producer, presents interviews with 21 successful black women fully enjoying singlehood with a range of opinions on their marriage prospects. Among the women interviewed are actress Kim Coles, author Deborah Gregory (of Cheetah Girls fame), movie producer Effie Brown, and an assortment of other professionals. The women applaud the television shows Living Single and Girlfriends for depictions of beautiful and successful single black women, and discuss the sometimes negative images of black women and the impact of the high unemployment and incarceration rates of black men on marriage prospects. Mostly, they recount their own personal journeys to accepting, enjoying, and capitalizing on their times as single women. Though written from black women's perspectives, this book has appeal for all women looking for a fresh take on being single.”



“…I Didn’t Work This Hard Just To Get Married is filled with statistics, great information and details on how society views black women and our obligations to our children, families, and communities. We are also privy to some quirky tales of marriages gone wrong, single parenting, baby-mama drama and much more…



This book is for women of all ages; women who believe their clocks are ticking and are running out of time. Women who feel like they need a man to define them, you will definitely enjoy this book from cover-to-cover as you take this journey into finding yourself.”

Reviewed by: Cheryl Hayes, APOOO BookClub



"What an incredibly liberating and inspiring collection of stories...about learning to be comfortable in your skin and what u got –and that we are not alone in our journey. Thank you Nika for this gift."



Terrie M. Williams

Author, Black Pain: It Just Looks Like We're Not Hurting



"This is an exciting book that fully explores the option of single status and the lives of the women who choose it… Nika Beamon gives women making life choices a window into the thought processes of other women who have made similar choices. It is an important addition to work on the lives and options of African American women, and it is an absorbing read."



Julianne Malveaux

President, Bennett College for Women



"Although I am an award-winning filmmaker, TV personality and author, many of my family members feel as though I lead a shallow and empty life because I choose to be unmarried without children. In this well-researched and thoughtful tome, Nika Beamon has given a voice to true choice among women in this post-millennial era."


Abiola Abrams, BET host

Author of the novel, Dare